stuff i tell my sister

Today I reflect on this past week and how troubling it has been for my mind, my soul, my marriage.  My faith and trust are rocked.  I am frustrated, angry, sad, helpless, scared for his health, but told to not rock the boat.  Don’t. Say. Anything.  But this is my blog~ my words and thoughts, and with respect to my hubby, but for my ulcer’s sake, I must vent. And because I don’t know if I’ve won tonight’s lottery, I will choose my words carefully.  🙂

How does it happen though?  A man gets a small loan, starts a business in his garage.  He sacrifices, works hard, makes good business decisions, and his socks are blessed off in just a few years. The American dream!  He is now a billionaire who employs thousands and shares his blessings!   While his statements still say he does everything based on his Christian foundation, I think there may have been an earthquake.  Reality.  check.  needed.

A man died on January 3rd of this month.  I don’t know the entire circumstances and won’t lead you to believe that I do.  But I do know he was born the same month and year as my hubby.  And I know he worked for/with the same people.  His wife is now a widow.  They will offer condolences.  Life insurance.  Flowers. Cards. She is alone. Another manager will replace her husband. Everything will go on.  No press on what happened.  No lesson learned.  Still demanding 14-18 hour days.

Frankly, I do not want to be a widow.

Health. Exhaustion.  Marital struggles.  Divorce.  Missing your son’s buzzer shot at his basketball game.  Wondering what your redhead’s face looked like the first time he sang on stage. Being chastised for taking a weekend off for your wedding anniversary. Unknown Sacrifice. 

Remember where you came from, dear owner.  It is good and it is right to take a stand for the unborn.  But look out for the living as well.  Especially for those who, no matter what, still lovingly give you their all.  And I mean, their all.